first week home

The first month after the twins were born was insane. Luckily my mom stayed with us for 2 weeks because I don't think I could have done it with out her. I didn't sleep much and I couldn't really do much because of my rash and recovering body.

 

Not a lot happened with the babies. Their umbilical cords fell off and we got some baby pictures taken. Other than that it was just typical baby stuff. Again I wish I would have written something down in those early days! I want to say they were good babies but I don't know if that's true because I can't remember.

 

The first thing Eric did when we got home from the hospital

 



 

First day home

 



 

The rest of the week

 

 

First bath

 

Night before my mom left

 

 

 

STOP now if you don't want to see a gross picture of my swollen feet and rash!

 

 

 

I had a rash on my belly about a week before I had the twins. After I gave birth it spread to the rest of my body and turned into blisters. I went to the dermatologist and the doctor was amazed because she'd never seen anything like it. She gathered all her co-workers around to check it out and discuss the diagnosis. I couldn't take anything orally because I was breastfeeding so she prescribed some topical creams and sprays. She also took several biopsies to send to the lab. It got really bad before it started to get better. And the total bummer was that whenever I put the creams/sprays on I couldn't touch the babies. I had to wear long sleeves and long pants constantly and be very careful around the babies. Turns out I have a pregnancy induced auto immune disease. So anytime I get pregnant I will get this rash. But hopefully it will never get this bad again because we'll be watching for it and catch it a lot sooner.

 

This was taken a couple days home from the hospital and before I went to the dermatologist.

sixteen

i have a couple different belly shots from different weeks but i just look fat in all of them. i've had a belly almost the whole time because of all the invitro stuff. but now, it's actually starting to look and feel like a pregnant belly. it's so fun. every time i look down at it i am overwhelmed with gratitude.

next week we have another ultrasound and hopefully we'll get a more concrete idea of what we are having {i'll be 17 weeks}. i am SO excited. E claims to know that they are both boys. i have my heart set on a boy and a girl. but as long as there are two steady heartbeats i will be thrilled.

last week i started working summer hours: 4, 10 hour days with fridays off. just like last summer. and just like last summer i have mixed feelings about this change. one thing that is much better this summer... the people i am working with. i don't really mind spending my 10 hour days with some good friends.

last weekend {for the first time in about 18 weeks} i actually had energy to do things. i forgot what that was like. it was nice to have a little motivation and energy back to get some things accomplished and not just be lazy all the time.

tomorrow we leave for a long weekend in st george with friends. so excited for this.

it's peach and nectarine season. these are seriously the best fruits around. i can not eat enough of them. and we also like to do peach shakes. peaches and vanilla ice cream in the vitamix. it is to die for.

have you listened to DREAM by priscilla ahn. you should.

confessions

i am not doing the triathlon anymore {insert disappointment here}.

it was dang expensive {$100} to enter the race.

because i am not doing the race, my training ended... total bummer that i am such a slacker {i was really enjoying the swimming}.

i am seeking some motivation again {someone help me...}.

i really need an exercise partner {E is not training at the moment, too busy with other endeavors}.

the other day i was telling E that i love how he is so open to different & new ideas.

he responded with, i love when you exercise {he's a funny one}.

only 4 more days of class left for E {he confessed to me that he is going to miss it}. i know, crazy, E miss school?

today i am

feeling good about my body

going swimming

cooking this {requested by E}

feeling sad/frustrated/angry about mine and others infertility

listing this mini quilt in my shop {E said it is his favorite of everything i've made} it's flannel and super duper soft

wearing my j crew, skinny leg, navy blue, corduroy pants, that i bought for $10, on my trip to CA this past january {love these pants}

watching lost with E

starting on a skirt, for a friend, out of this fabric

loving the song, you don’t know me by ben folds featuring regina spektor. it's pure genius. i like to sing the chorus to E, it makes me laugh. {note: the song has 2 bad words in it, listen to the clean version}

wishing i was somewhere else than where i am

arbitrary

the painting is done and i am oh so happy. we painted every single wall and ceiling in the whole house. it looks much better now. no more rose walls in the hall anymore.

we were using my sewing room as the temporary storage room for the tools, paint, rollers, towels, brushes, etc. while we were painting everything. i haven't used my machine in over a month but tonight i'm busting it out again. cause if you haven't heard, the painting is done and now the room can go back to it's original use. i have a million projects in my mind that need to be executed.

i've been obsessed with reading lately. i'm at a pace of approximately one book per week. 2 weeks ago it was the lovely bones. it was decent, i liked it. last week it was the goose girl and i loved it. this week i'm reading water for elephants. i have mixed feelings about it. i can't put it down, but there's definitely parts i don't like about it. the next two in the lineup, the poisonwood bible and a prayer for owen meany. so far i've read 6 books in january. if i keep this up, that will be 72 books in one year, what! do you think i can do it?

my new favorite snack. they are perfect. not too unhealthy and a little sweet.

i like this month. it's a good one. lots of great people born this month. my sis, my nephew, my father in law, 3 childhood friends, mindi (who did this with me) and another niece will be born this month too. some other people born this month: ronald reagan, bob marley, jennifer aniston, abraham lincoln, chris farley, john mcenroe, michael jordan, john travolta, steve irwin, george washington, steven jobs, pierre auguste renoir, johnny cash and john steinbeck.

lost starts tomorrow night and i am excited for the final season to begin so i can finally see how it all ends. hopefully i wont be disappointed because then my time invested watching the series wont be a total waste.

some things i've been eyeing lately
necklace
pattern
headband
dress
fabric
hand towel

oh yeah and infertility is the pits. but i guess it's good to laugh. i love laughing.

five gratefuls

grateful for water

grateful for good books

grateful for kind words

grateful for missionaries

grateful for a good hair cut

latest

treat

peach shake {vanilla ice cream and fresh ripe peaches}

project{s}
way too many to list... lots of sewing going on around here {i did not forget about you five people. your patience will be rewarded}

music

imogen heap, u2 and ingrid michaelson {lately}
sway by bic runga & in a tree by priscilla ahn {specifically}

love

this skirt i purchased at anthro {last one on the sale rack, one size too big, but couldn't pass it up, i'm making it work and boy is it cute}

frustration
commuting {got a temp job for a couple weeks, but the commute is horrendous}

excitement

the library {i explored the library in tempe a couple days ago. let me just say, i LOVE the library. i spent a couple hours there wandering the aisles, picking up random books, sitting on the floor reading said books and taking home enough material to keep me occupied}

goalstart running again {took a little break since the half. still considering a marathon, haven't made the final decision yet}

looking forward to
lilith fair - summer 2010 {who wants to go with me}

discovery

new game on iphone, boxed in {can't.stop.playing}

self portrait

me {deciding what project to work on next}

read

sense and sensibility {"His manly beauty and more than common gracefulness were instantly the theme of the general admiration, and the laugh which his gallantry raised against Marianne, received particular spirit from his exterior attractions."}

challenge

learning to love where i am at in life right now {it's a work in progress}

we never see things changing, we only see them ending

title is from one of my favorite lines, from one of my favorite singers. i feel that this is very applicable to me and my life right now.

this is my last week of work. i have mixed feelings about this. it will be nice to have a little break from working. but i have LOVED this job... it has been the best job i've had by far. the people are great, they are like my family. the campus is gorgeous, i never tire of staring at the beautiful scenery. i am a little sad to leave it all behind.

i don't think i ever mentioned that we recovered ALL our data from the crashed hard drive. this was made possible by my awesome cousins and their company inter data recovery services, who actually did all the hard work and reunited us with the data. it was a sweet, sweet reunion when we finally got it back. eric and i spent that night dancing to all the music we thought we'd lost. now we have everything backed up properly in 2 different places... we learned our lesson.

i think i'm in denial. i haven't really started processing the fact that in 2 weeks we will be gone. i haven't started packing a single thing. we have no boxes and haven't lined up a way to move our stuff. i don't have a job. we haven't decided on where to live. like i said, complete denial. but there's something to be said about sitting in limbo. it's kind of exhilarating.

when i answer the phone at work i say, "registrar's office, this is tiffany". i think i talk fast or slur my words (actually i know i do) because people call me all sorts of names. for example: stacey, vicky, sydney, kimberly, tracy and my favorite, stephanie.

on saturday i happened upon my accordion file of all the congratulatory cards we got from our wedding. there were 2 things i did and 3 things i thought. first thing i did, read all the cards. second thing i did, threw all but 10 of them in the trash. first thing i thought, A LOT of people loved and supported us. second thing i thought, has anyone else kept these kind of cards for 5 years. third thing i thought, maybe i shouldn't have just thrown them all away, i might want to read them in another 5 years and remember how much we were loved.

"You got a dream… you gotta protect it. People can't do somethin' themselves, so they wanna tell you, you can't do it. If you want somethin', go get it. Period."

it all comes down to this

race is tomorrow
i am excited
and a little nervous


this is big for me
i will be so happy
when i'm done


think about me
tomorrow at 7:30
i will need it

me self

In the past as I’ve heard stories or talked to people that have struggled with getting pregnant, I always felt sympathetic and tried to understand the pain and sorrow that accompanies it. In the back of my mind I never thought we would struggle with it. I was wrong. But there’s a part of me that’s glad I'm wrong, because now I do understand. If we had never struggled with it, I never would have understood. What a great gift, to be able to really understand another human being and how they may feel.

Each day I consciously make an effort to not let it bother me. But I have my moments when it gets to me. When that happens, the feelings flood my mind for several days. Then it passes and leaves me feeling empty inside. After those episodes, I work on not feeling bitter by trying to think of everything I’m blessed with. It usually works and then I'm happy again. On the occasions that it doesn’t work and the tears still come... {I PRAY} and that’s the only thing that brings me peace.

i LOVE this, i could play on it for hours... in fact i do.

i LIKE this, it's a good one to waste time on too.

i ENJOY new project ideas... this is the next one i am going to try out.

i LUST after this, in the red.

i FOUND out that this place sells fabric... i am interested.

PB

As I was dipping my celery in peanut butter today, I couldn't help but wonder who thought to put these 2 together. Whoever did was a genius. It is so good, seriously delicious.

In my google search to find out who/what/when thought of this great idea I came across a few things

this article featured on npr, which I found rather enlightening

this page, which had me laughing, my favorite... #7

this club, that I am considering joining

these shirts, in so many different styles

this on wikipedia

I just spent half the day reading about peanut butter... I'd say it was a successful day. {I didn't realize how much I love peanut butter. I think I might need to get one of those shirts}

happenings

its been raining a lot these past 2 weeks and i love it. but seeing the beautiful clear blue sky today did get me excited for sunshine again

i got some new sewing books... this and this are 2 of them. i am obsessed with my sewing books and all their waiting projects for me. i fantasize about sewing all day, everyday. there are so many things I want to create and try

we got photoshop and i'm already spending way too much time on it

i am sad jillian is gone

i am reading a really good book... a thousand splendid suns. ok maybe i could sew and read all day

i love learning how to use my camera and i'm getting some great tips from here. oh how i would love to be a great photographer, maybe some day after a lot of practice

i am cooking more than I ever have and am surprised that i am actually liking it

i really like this

i am excited for this weekend

i got this for my birthday. i like to caress it and smell it and look at it

the end is in sight

I have 13 more days left and I am finding that this is the hardest it has been to resist...

Especially the candy canes. I keep finding myself trying to justify eating a candy cane because it's just peppermint but then I remind myself... if the word candy is in it's name, it's candy. I will just have to save my candy cane for January.

I decided the only reason it is getting harder for me is because the end is in sight (and because all my co workers shower me with treats and candy everyday).

I haven't decided what candy I am going to eat at 12:01am, Jan 1st. Any suggestions?

I've lost some weight in the past 2 months. It obviously makes me happy. I like to attribute it to the fact that I haven't eaten any candy or deserts for 12 months.

I am afraid I will gain 5 lbs in January... I am determined to not let that happen.

I think my mind craves the sweets more than my body does. My theory is that your body forgets what it feels like to eat sugar, but your mind doesn't.

christmas thoughts

Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper

Real tree or Artificial? REAL

When do you put up the tree? Beginning of December

When do you take the tree down? After new years, if it's still alive

Do you like eggnog? No

Favorite gift received as a child? The gigantic Teddy Bear. You know what I'm talking about mom and dad. Thanks, I loved that thing.
Hardest person to buy for? Eric

Easiest person to buy for? I have a hard time thinking of and finding gifts for people. I really think it is a talent that you have or develop. I don't have it and haven't developed it yet. Someone help me, please. Sorry all you that have to receive gifts from me. I'm trying my hardest.

Do you have a nativity scene? Yes

Mail or email Christmas cards? Both. I love receiving them, but I don't send them.
Worst Christmas gift you ever received? A plastic reindeer covered in glitter

When do you start shopping for Christmas? Right now. I spend so much time trying to figure out what to buy, I don't get around to buying it till right about now.

Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? No

Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Christmas morning breakfast

Lights on the tree? Of course

Favorite Christmas song? God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen by Bare Naked Ladies featuring Sarah McLachlan. It is so great, if you haven't heard it, you need to listen to it. Eric and I love dancing and singing to it. I also love Manheim Steamroller.
Travel at Christmas or stay home? Both. I love being at home, but I love traveling. Sometimes you have to travel to get "home"
Can you name all of Santa's reindeer's? Yes

Angel on the tree top or a star? STAR

Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? You can't open anything on Christmas Eve. You have to do it all in the Morning.

Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Nothing, I love it all

Favorite ornament theme or color? None, I like the eclectic-random look

Favorite for Christmas dinner? Good Food and Good Sauce

What do you want for Christmas this year?
I'd REALLY LOVE this
But realistically, I would love anything from anthro or jcrew
I Love I-tunes gift cards
Anything to do with sewing (fabric, books, patterns)

two good things and a thought

number oneA couple days ago I put on these black slacks I haven't worn since last winter. When I reached into the pocket later that morning, I found 10 dollars. I was excited to find some cash. But what was even better, was the mood it put me in for the rest of the day. I was all cheerful and bouncy, making people laugh and having a jolly good time. Isn't it amazing that something so small can put a positive spin on things and change your attitude altogether. I love it. I wish I could find money in my pocket every day so that I would always be positive and cheerful.

number twoI fit into my skinny jeans! I wasn't trying to for any particular reason, but last week I decided to try them on and see how they fit. Bam - they fit and and it was a joyous occasion. It opened up several more outfit possibilities and it just feels good. I ran around the house proclaiming to Eric, "I fit into my skinny jeans". Fitting into clothes you love always makes you feel amazing. I guess all the no candy and desserts has finally paid off. YESSSSS!

thought
The other day I was driving home from work and had this thought, "I am only 23 years old, I have so much more life to live, lessons to learn and things to enjoy". Sometimes I get stuck. My brain only thinks of the immediate future and what I am doing the next week. Then I have these moments of thought that I just described and I feel young and free. The world is mine to conquer and there is so much more to me/myself that I have not yet even discovered. How exciting!

my blogs of note

My blog reading has changed a lot recently. I use the "follow" tool created by blogger. You should use it, it saves a lot of time. You add and save the links to your favorite blogs and it tells you when and what blogs have been updated (all in one place too).
So on a typical blog checking moment, I log into blogger and go to my dashboard. At the bottom is my list of all the blogs I follow. From there I check all the blogs that have been updated. I check my blog list like every hour. I know it's pathetic, I am addicted. It's hard not to check it though when you are sitting at a computer all day.

More info about following and how to do it
Onto the TAG from Jo
The first blogs I check are ones that get updated the most often. I also love reading the blogs that don't get updated as often because it's fun to hear from someone that hasn't posted in a while. What can I say, I LOVE BLOGS. I check family members blogs everyday, even if there is no new post. So here's a list of blogs I check, that I am not related to, that I love.

1. Kirin Notebook
2. C Jane enjoy it
3. Wikstenmade
4. Nie Nie Dialogues
5. Blog of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks

quote, self portrait and a P.S.

QUOTE
"Bad habits are like comfortable trousers… easy to get into but hard to get out of"

SELF PORTRAIT
































P.S.
I'm in Vegas celebrating an awesome man's 90th birthday (my granpa)

for the love of shoes

I purchased these shoes at macy's for 12 dollars. SO great. I received them in the mail a couple days ago and have worn them everyday since. Love them and love how much I paid for them, given that they were originally 60 dollars.

hidden talents

I am discovering all sorts of talents lately. Today one of my coworkers told me that I have the unique talent of sharpening pencils good and that I am fast at it. (I'm not kidding, she actually told me this and I couldn't help but laugh because of my previous post). Who new I was so talented.

I also find humor in this because lately I have been trying to figure out what my talents are. And here I have got 2 answers to my concerns, I can peel oranges and I can sharpen pencils.